Love, sex, weddings, and marriage for feminists, the LGBTQ community, & woke folk.
As a S.A.D. sufferer, summer is typically my jam. There is plenty of sun, which means plenty of Vitamin D. I thrive at the beach, and I live in jean shorts. It’s really my ideal state. Except that depression and anxiety know no seasons, and comparison isn’t reserved for the cold months. Recently, an artist I follow on Instagram posted an illustration and said, “is reverse SAD a thing?” I always look to summer to lighten my moods, but I find sometimes, like this summer, specifically, I have spent a lot of time feeling pretty shitty about what I don’t possess or what I’m not doing, or about the beach pics I am not sharing with the Instagram followers I don’t have. Because, suffice it to say, nothing is sufficient in the comparison game.
They were married on the coast, celebrated under a tent filled with everyone they loved, and only escaped for a moment to hold hands and walk on the sandy beach. Two men in love, married by the water, dancing through the night.
Julie and Kevin met in Edmonton during High School. Some like to call them High School sweethearts, although they didn't start their relationship until they entered University. It was important to them to host the wedding in their vibrant hometown, surrounded by their community, family and friends. Julie and Kevin’s vision was to have a traditional wedding (church ceremony, reception, dance party) that had a mix of cultural elements. With Julie's mother from Trinidad and father from Ghana, they were thrilled to include Caribbean dancers and African drummers as part of their celebration.
Trump's Tuesday press conference demonstrated not only complacency in white supremacy, but also support of these acts. I sat in horror and disbelief as I watched the president of the United States condemn the "alt-left," a made-up term for those fighting for human rights and against white supremacy. I watched him talk over reporters, shout at people, and go completely off teleprompter. But really, were any of us surprised?
I am typing this while our little dude naps in my arms. I know, I know, there are probably a dozen reasons why that will cause detrimental habits with his sleeping or may cause him not to go to college. But, for now, I am not worried about that. I just picked him up from daycare, and those cheeks burrowed on my chest are exactly what the end of the day calls for. One thing I have learned in eight months as a new parent is that there is an abundance of information, personal opinions, and stories about how things used to be in terms of raising a child that inundate us (and feed our anxiety) every day. However, with the abundance of information available about parenthood, there is a major gap in information and resources available for same-sex parents. I have thought about writing up a bit about our experience and chickened out a few times, but I struggled a lot with becoming a mom (by way of my wife), and I am hoping to give voice to the growing complexity and great diversity in what constitutes a family.
North Carolina photographer Latoya Dixon and her husband, Lee, are just as gorgeous on the inside as they are on the outside. When I started planning this shoot, I knew they would be perfect for the spot! They had a courthouse elopement and didn't have a big wedding. So, we treated her like a bride. She went dress shopping for the first time with her mom! We had her makeup done on site by my amazing makeup artist friend. It was amazing!
Trupti and Patrick met a few years ago at work. They got to chatting over Star Wars, and the rest (as they say) is history. Their friendship grew into romance, and eventually they adopted a cat and a fluffy white puppy. Getting married was in the stars. We had the honor of photographing their wedding. It was extra special to us, as the bride and groom are friends of mine. The rain came and went during the day, and a few thunder rumbles added a bit of extra drama to the tented outdoor ceremony. But nothing could ruin this day (not even a terrible mishap with a safety pin in the bride’s sari). Just look at their faces, and it is plain as day: these two are madly in love. Their wedding was beautiful, the food was amazing, and it really was difficult to pick a favorite between Trupti’s traditional Indian attire and the stunning white wedding dress she changed into for the reception.
We have a juicy question this month from a Catalyst reader:
“I'm in a hetero relationship, and I love playing the submissive — handcuffs, blindfolds, the works — and while I really enjoy it in the moment, it always leaves me feeling questionable about the feminism of hetero bondage play. I seriously need help resolving these things in my head!”
Definitely a complicated thing to work through! Thank you for asking, and remember to submit your (anonymous!) burning questions by Friday, August 18, for the chance to get them answered next month.
When planning a wedding, typically you do so without ever thinking you will virtually undo all of it. The endless coordination of vendors and schedules, guests and wedding party — there is an emotional investment in each of these phone calls, emails and appointments. They all become a part of this process leading to a day when you will pledge your life and love to another person. However, when the wedding is called off just weeks before the big day, and everything comes to a halt, you are left with...what exactly? I was not sure. It was a painful decision to make, but somehow I knew it was the right one for myself and my son.
As a wedding planner, logistics are a huge part of my job: timing the guest transportation to and from the venue, timing the catering staff, ensuring there is enough time budgeted for the "shot list" the couple provided to the photographer, etc.
If you are between the ages of 20 and 40, you've probably been invited to a few weddings, and if you haven't recently planned your own fête, there can easily be rules of etiquette you are breaking without even realizing it.
Here are some helpful tips to be a kick-ass wedding guest.
Kathy and Kim's wedding was featured last month, and now they are having a baby. Here are their maternity photos, photographed by their wedding photographer Chloe Jackman, with words by Katy.
Three years prior to the day they wed, Sean and Ryan met. “Our meeting was pure luck, and not just because it was on St. Patrick's Day. Sean was on a scavenger hunt and needed the shamrock beads that Ryan was wearing. He won the hunt and scored Ryan’s number!” They’ve been together ever since.
As I was driving home, my head swirled with thoughts of "the Truth" and how "Christians" can sometimes be the least likely to draw people to Christ. I began to ponder why is it that the African American community (most of it) has not embraced and affirmed LGBTQ individuals? Truth be told, there are those family members that we always knew preferred the same sex, but it was never discussed. Not only was it not discussed, they just never seemed to bring anyone to the family dinners or get-togethers.
...a car drove by and its male driver slowed to honk his horn to harass us ... Thankfully, I had these two badass women in front of the camera. They coolly looked toward the car, and with the greatest of ease, extended their middle fingers as high as they could ... These two women were the perfect embodiment of what I wanted to represent. Be aggressively yourself.