12 Questions to Determine What Kind of Wedding You Should Have

You just got engaged! Congrats! Don't freak out. Here are 12 questions to ground you and lay the foundation for your wedding priorities. And if you're already partnered, these questions are a good way to check-in with your loved one.


1. How did you and your partner meet?

Go on, gush a little.

2. How long have you been together?

Is this a "we knew instantly" thing or a "we've been friends forever" thing?

3. Describe your engagement, or alternatively, when you "knew."

Tell us what happened! This is an important plot point in your love story.

4. What makes your S.O. the perfect partner for you?

Your special connection is the foundation for what kind of wedding/elopement/party you will plan.

5. What characterizes your relationship with your partner? Does your partnership have a personality?

This personality should have a voice that is loud and clear at your wedding. Why do things just like everyone else when you two have your own brand of weird?

6. What are some of your common interests?

Which of these might it be feasible to incorporate into your celebration? Music lyrics as a ceremony reading? Your pup in a bowtie? Dinner served by your favorite local restaurant? (Be mindful that you don't need to incorporate ALL of your common interests; that's too much pressure!)

7. What season do you have in mind for your wedding?

Plan to harmonize with the weather. AKA don't hope for a cool breeze in August or a 60-degree day in December (dependent on your geographical location); embrace the seasons!

8. Do you have a theme or vibe in mind? A color scheme?

I'm sure you have a couple ideas that are milling about in your minds. Time to make an inspiration board!

9. What are your top three priorities for the wedding? (3 things that must happen)

Let's be honest. No wedding day goes PERFECTLY as you planned and scheduled in your day-of timeline. That being said, there is plenty of opportunity to FEEL like the day was perfect, especially if you embrace the inevitable bumps along the way. So let's just list three top, top, top priorities for the day, and remember to keep your chill for all the other stuff.

10. What have you seen at other weddings that you really liked? Disliked?

Cocktail hour in between the ceremony and party? Band or DJ? Speeches or no? Allow your dad to give a toast? Think about what you appreciated as a guest, and be mindful of the guest experience at your own wedding.

11. What would you like your guests to remember about your ceremony?

The ceremony is likely to be the most memorable part of the day and sets the tone for your partnership (no pressure!). What is the most important thing you want to convey to each other and your community about what all this hubbub really means?

12. How would you like your guests to feel when they leave your wedding?

Hearts warmed? Bellies full? A little drunk? A lot drunk? Again, focus on the feeling, as this will be the mission you come back to as you plan. Don't get carried away crafting twine balls if in fact your aim is to have a great dance party love fest.


Liz Susong is the editor of Catalyst Wed Co. She got way too carried away with twine balls at her wedding.