Jewish tradition teaches that a wedding celebrates the creation of a new world, a new beginning that may change the meaning of everything that has come before. We love the endless possibilities to be inspired by and to build upon ancient Jewish wedding rituals.

A phrase I heard repeatedly when I worked as a bridal consultant was, “it only happens once!” Bridal consultants and guests frequently used this phrase when a bride thought twice about a purchase.

For example, let’s say a bride was trying to decide whether or not she should wear a veil. A bridal consultant could then reply with, “It’s your wedding, it only happens once! You’ll only be wearing the veil a short time, and it’ll make such an impact.” In this case, the bridal consultant is appealing to a bride's emotional desire to both look fantastic on her wedding day and to plan a successful and memorable party. This sales tactic is often times effective, as the desire to plan the perfect wedding is the fuel that keeps the wedding industry alive.

Dear Quyn,

Our wedding is just around the corner, and everything’s starting to pile up! We’re nervous, stressed, and, worst of all, worried that all of this anxiety is going to show up in our photos. How do we stay sane throughout all of this?

Help,

Bundle of Nerves

Many jewelry retailers have jumped on the ethical bandwagon or tout conflict-free diamonds, but what does ethical really mean for the conscientious shopper about to commit to an engagement ring or wedding band? How do you cut through the noise and the the green-washing to get to the truth? What questions should you ask to ensure that your rings are made with standards that address glaring issues like unsafe working conditions at mines and cutting facilities, the environmental effects of mining, and child labor? The following tips should help you navigate through the complex process of choosing truly ethical wedding rings, and create a ring that both represents and supports love and progress.

No matter what your background is, this guide will help you and your partner prioritize the religious and cultural traditions that matter to you and prep you for those tricky family convos. These tips also set you up to understand, honor, and incorporate traditional Jewish customs into your wedding in a relevant and inclusive way.

Dear Ciera,

My partner and I are recently engaged and can’t wait to get started planning our big day! We are hoping to buy our first home soon, so we’d like to keep our wedding budget under $15k. Any tips on how to manage this budget?

Sincerely,

Newly Engaged & Economical

Searching for wedding rings can be exhausting. There are seemingly millions of options — and you don’t want to choose something flippantly because it is something you plan to wear for the rest of your life. It should be special. It should mean something. You should love your ring, right? After all, the wedding ring symbolizes your never-ending, unbroken devotion to your chosen life partner. It’s a big deal.

Black BeauTEA talk is a monthly column, and I look forward to bringing you ladies all sorts of TEA. No, seriously I'll definitely be sharing with you all what tea (as in the drink) I'm sipping as I write each post, as well as what tea (as in the latest news) I'm sipping as far aa beauty tips, tricks, and products for us.

I love Valentine's Day, because I love LOVE. For best friends, neighbors, siblings, roommates, co-workers, kiddos, fellow human beings, and (yes, occasionally) romantic partners. I'm excited about a day that gives us an excuse to tell all the wonderful people in our lives “I love you, and I'm glad you're here.”

You just got engaged! Congrats! Don't freak out. Here are 12 questions to ground you and lay the foundation for your wedding priorities. And if you're already partnered, these questions are a good way to check-in with your loved one.

The internet is crawling with playlists to match your wedding morning joy. If you rise like a flower, float to your bridal party, and arrive at the venue on a magic carpet — those playlists are for you. For all the betrothed who are hoping to speed through their makeup routine so they have more time to dance in the hotel room with their best friends, turn this up. 

Most couples have anxiety about their ceremony, after all it is the highlight of the day and movies have taught us that we’re meant to freak out. Consider instead a quieter ceremony with just your immediate family. Your friends can join you at cocktail hour, and I promise they will be fine with it! When you say private ceremony, guests understand. If they don’t, tough for them. Remember, you can always get married in total privacy with just the two of you and still have a wedding reception with everyone! It’s a thing, and it’s awesome.

Once upon a time, women were considered no more than chattel. We had no property rights, and it was widely believed that our brains were shaped like high-heel glass slippers. If divorce or death ended a marriage, women were usually forced to make do with a shack deep in the forest, twelve cats, and several coffee-table books on witchcraft. Prenuptial agreements were introduced specifically to avoid this outcome.

Good afternoon! And welcome to a cookie chronicle that will go down in history as the best thing to happen in 2017, due to lack of competition. Just kidding. I'm hoping we see lots of beauty, love, resilience, and badassery in the days ahead — things much more important than cookies. But for the days we don't/can't see those things, I'm here for you. Who am I, you ask? (You didn't, but since I'm the one writing this, it really doesn't matter what you are and are not saying.) I'm a little baker based in Virginia who loves butter, Beyoncé, Michelle Obama’s arms, Michelle Obama’s everything, Drake’s feelings, superheroes, anti heroes, graphic novels, black excellence, spirituality, cheese, dranks, ice cream, “me time,” and these pants I got from Costco that look like real pants but are actually basically yoga pants. And I come with cookies.

We've seen articles about which wedding dress you should pick based on your astrological sign, but what if you are not interested in wearing a dress on your wedding day. What if, instead, a pant suit or jumpsuit is more up your alley? Look no further, we have the guide for you!

In the endless sea of wedding planning there’s one thing that has the power to elicit both boundless excitement and nervous dread: the dress, or to be precise, shopping for the dress. While many couples are beginning to realize there are alternatives to traditional dress shopping, like DIY dresses and amazing vintage thrift store finds, brides continue to flock to high-fashion boutiques that speak to eurocentric ideologies of beauty and style. While the traditionalist boutique is certainly an attractive option for some, there are just as many brides looking for another option. There’s a brave new world of bridal gowns out there, one that is entrenched in our reemerging appreciation of the highly skilled craftsperson, and it’s online. 

As a feminist wedding professional, I have a responsibility to challenge and critique the wedding industry. I work with brides each week, and in the intimate space of a fitting room I'm told about their greatest joys and anxieties. I owe it to them to make sure they're equally represented in an industry that continually discriminates against them. 

I remember our wedding ceremony so completely — the light breezy air coming through the wide open windows of the Quaker meeting house, the bright sky showing through a skylight over our heads, and the smiles of loved ones all around us. I remember the absolute joy and the palpable energy that my husband and I shared as we sat together in what will surely be counted as one of the best moments of our lives. 

What if you and your spouse-to-be decided together how to measure the success of your marriage, even if it didn’t last “until death”? What if you decided to individualize your marriage so it was as unique as your wedding, as unique as the two of you are? After all, you don’t want to just create a life with him or her; you want to create a specific kind of life. Your kind of life. 

In celebration of this great moment, and to help you craft a ceremony that embodies your own highest aspirations, here are nine new game-changing vows for modern couples.