What are all the unacknowledged ways that a bride labors over her own wedding? A big part of it is emotional labor. More often than not, the bride is the wedding’s emotional referee. She fields dozens of requests, needs, and opinions (so many opinions!) from family, friends, and other guests. The stakes are high, too. If she messes up and shows any sign of frustration or anxiety or stress, there’s a nasty word to put her back in her place (it rhymes with “Godzilla”).Read More
I am not a mental health practitioner in the slightest, but as someone who suffers from anxiety, ADHD, and owns a wedding planning firm, I can speak uniquely to how to handle the two. Here are my tips to manage your mental health while you’re wedding planning.Read More
Halloween may have passed but there’s still time for one more horror story: This Thanksgiving, you’re hosting. Whether you’re already married, getting married, or recently married, family functions have a way of stressing everyone out.Read More
Yoga, meditation, and mindfulness all go hand in hand, and that's why Lilia and Olivia of wedwell believe so strongly in bringing these wellness practices into your life as you prepare to take your walk down the aisle. They offer guided meditations specifically for the wedding planning process, as well as a Bridal Wedding Guide for female-identified folks who often face added pressures from the wedding industry.Read More
The days and weeks leading up to your wedding can be among the most stressful of your life. Many couples find that weddings come with a lot of expectations, both their own and other peoples’. Figuring out all the details for the big day can make it feel like your head might explode. Whether you’re at that point or you feel yourself getting there, counteract that stress by getting more sleep. Not sure how to help yourself fall asleep when life feels like too much? Here are some tips that have helped other couples rest up so they can enjoy their big day.Read More
Sometimes the day gets the best of you and you're exhausted, need a nap, or are too stressed to even sit still! Whether the stress is caused by writing your wedding guest list, thinking about the long standing history of inequality in the wedding industry (ugh), or just from looking at too many Pinterest wedding photos and not knowing how to handle yourself, you may need to literally shake out the stress from your body. With this short sequence, you'll be shaking and dancing around spreading that energy elsewhere! Goodbye stress and hello world!Read More
As a psychotherapist, this is one of the busiest times of year. Why? Because “The Holidays” bring up so many unrealistic expectations for many of us. We get depressed because we compare ourselves, our gifts and our families with what we think other people experience. We all imagine everyone else is having a lot more fun than we are.
But honestly, we have no idea how happy or miserable anyone else is behind their façade. If you could sit in my chair and hear how unhappy most people are at this time of year, you’d stop envying them.Read More
There is a Zen teaching that goes “when you have only a little time, meditate for 10 minutes. And if you have no time at all, then meditate for 20.” This teaching acknowledges that a sense of not having enough time is not an objective law, but rather a subjective experience, one that we can change.Read More
Planning and preparing for a wedding can be stressful. Start the process of alleviating your stress by identifying the sources. There are two types of stress: eustress, which is positive and can be motivating, and distress, a negative source of anxiety. What is unnecessary and can be left behind, eradicated, or revamped? Create a to-do list, and delegate tasks to people that you trust, like your wedding party or coordinator who will help to disperse the load. Surround yourself with a positive support team that can help you to stay clear of unnecessary tension. Then begin implementing a daily routine like meditation and breathing techniques with a cup of herbal tea to start your day. This can create a moment for yourself and set the tone that will help you to feel grounded and ready to tackle what’s left on your to-do list.Read More
As a wedding planner for a little over three years, I get asked quite frequently what a wedding planner does. Being a black woman, I’ve grown to understand that it’s just not common to hire a wedding planner in the black community. It’s just not the cultural norm. Typically the mother of the bride, Auntie FeeFee, or the family’s self proclaimed fashion guru handles the “coordination.” There is the possibility that the wedding day can run smoothly using such “coordinators,” but isn’t it easier to hire a professional? Yes!
So recently, I’ve been making it a point to make random posts on my social media page about what it is a wedding planner does and ask my followers why they would or would not hire a planner. So, to counteract the feedback I’ve received, here’s why you NEED a wedding planner.Read More
"I searched bridal magazines and the internet for inspiration, but only found a few brides in wheelchairs. And I didn't really related to any of them. Would I feel beautiful like my friends did when they found their dresses? Could I wear a dress and sit comfortably all day, or would I need to wear a pantsuit or a two-piece ensemble? I was willing to embrace these new bridal trends, but I secretly wanted a dress. So much of my world as a disabled woman is already unconventional. My fiancé had never even seen me in a dress, so it was important for me to wear a wedding dress.Read More